Ignore.
Mass Upheaval.
We did what any responsible individual caught in this situation would do.
And I was told later that what I did was wrong. That it was foolish on my part to have reacted to "such a small incident".
- What did that man do to you other than following you around? Are you sure he WAS following you? Anyone could be just standing outside the restaurant. Doesn't mean that person is following you...
~ But he was making faces at us. Leering. Licking his lips as he winked at us.... If that is not suggestive, what is?
- You acted rashly when you went and gave his car number to the police. He must've been simply driving around. How do you know he was following you? How can you make such a big fuss over something like this? Even I look at people when I go out... Whats wrong with that?
~ But do you leer at them? Make faces? Suggestive gestures? Honk at them on the road?
- Whatever it was, what you did was foolish. You should have ignored it.
~ Ignored it?
- Yes, you should've ignored the man's antics. Had he done something more serious than that, it would've made sense for you to react this way.
~ So basically, I should have waited around for that guy to pull us into the car and prove his malicious intent in a tangible way before taking any action against him? I should've waited around to be raped so that there'd be an irrefutable evidence of his evil?
- There are times when you have to ignore such acts... What good would registering a complaint with the police do? You would go back home tomorrow, but your friend is stays here. What if he tries to come after her or harm her in some way?
~ We came so close to being victims of a heinous crime that was possibly prevented because we took proactive steps to ensure our own safety. Doesn't That count for anything at all?
- What you did was wrong. All I'm saying is, you should've ignored it.
Outpouring of rage.
Social awakening.
Need of the hour... Change.
These are some of the catchphrases that my countrymen have come up with over the last 20-odd days. "A mass movement that shook the nation to its core"... "Changing the attitudes of the society"... And other ' opinions' that I won't even bother getting into!
HorseCrap! (I'm borrowing this from you, Drew... Its most apt here!)
I went out with a friend today.. We were planning on spending some time together.. Catch up, gossip, introspect, have fun. And that's when a lecherous bastard decides to ruin the day for us.
We spent a good half hour being followed by this creep... While he made leering faces at us, honking at us outside a crowded restaurant.
We raised hell about this man. We alerted the bystanders about his antics. We informed the managers of the establishment that he had been following us from. We informed the constable who was standing at a nearby traffic signal. We noted the number and make of the car he drove.
And we went to the police station to register a complaint against this shameless excuse for a man.
Ironically, when this happened, my friend and I were on our way to a protest/pledge-taking demonstration in that locality. My friend was going because she felt that this was a genuine, sincere attempt by the common man and she wanted to contribute and be a part of the movement in a productive way... I went because I had nothing better to do than accompany her.
We did what any responsible individual caught in this situation would do.
And I was told later that what I did was wrong. That it was foolish on my part to have reacted to "such a small incident".
- What did that man do to you other than following you around? Are you sure he WAS following you? Anyone could be just standing outside the restaurant. Doesn't mean that person is following you...
~ But he was making faces at us. Leering. Licking his lips as he winked at us.... If that is not suggestive, what is?
- You acted rashly when you went and gave his car number to the police. He must've been simply driving around. How do you know he was following you? How can you make such a big fuss over something like this? Even I look at people when I go out... Whats wrong with that?
~ But do you leer at them? Make faces? Suggestive gestures? Honk at them on the road?
- Whatever it was, what you did was foolish. You should have ignored it.
~ Ignored it?
- Yes, you should've ignored the man's antics. Had he done something more serious than that, it would've made sense for you to react this way.
~ So basically, I should have waited around for that guy to pull us into the car and prove his malicious intent in a tangible way before taking any action against him? I should've waited around to be raped so that there'd be an irrefutable evidence of his evil?
- There are times when you have to ignore such acts... What good would registering a complaint with the police do? You would go back home tomorrow, but your friend is stays here. What if he tries to come after her or harm her in some way?
~ We came so close to being victims of a heinous crime that was possibly prevented because we took proactive steps to ensure our own safety. Doesn't That count for anything at all?
- What you did was wrong. All I'm saying is, you should've ignored it.
Right. I should've ignored it. Only, I didn't. I'm very sorry to disappoint the world on this... But 'Ignoring' is simply not my style. The ostrich has never been a favourite with me...
My reaction and the consequent steps we took would've been justified had there been some amount of physical contact involved. "Did he touch you? Did he grope you? Did he say something to you?... No?? Then you're just a paranoid fool!"
Well, guess what?! If you want to wait around for something bad to happen in order to make legitimate responses, you're welcome to it. Please don't expect me to do the same.
I am not made to be a passive witness.
My reaction and the consequent steps we took would've been justified had there been some amount of physical contact involved. "Did he touch you? Did he grope you? Did he say something to you?... No?? Then you're just a paranoid fool!"
Well, guess what?! If you want to wait around for something bad to happen in order to make legitimate responses, you're welcome to it. Please don't expect me to do the same.
I am not made to be a passive witness.
And nobody did a thing? This is utterly shameful! All hypocrites around, all liars and all unwanting of change in this country. mere words or demonstrations don't mean a thing. I have, will always stand up against cheap antics and women degrading cheapsters. This is utterly shameful bangalore, utterly.
ReplyDeleteThey did react... The people we sought help from.. The bunch of drivers standing outside the ice-cream shop were the ones who called the police when we told them about the creep following us... They were the ones who volunteered to keep an eye out for him, so he doesn't come back to bother us... A policeman came to the spot just 5 mins after the call was made to the helpline.. It was prompt action at it's best Nishath. Only, the bastard got away...
ReplyDeleteAnd its not like we were hoping the police would do something and catch the guy then and there... But someone has to start. I've never seen protest marches deter a criminal/hooligan till date...
I think what you did was exactly what you should've done and anyone telling you otherwise needs to be told to grow a pair!
ReplyDeleteWe've spent nearly quarter of a century "ignoring" acts like these...and what good has that done except encourage the hooligans...a guy who would've just whistled at a woman, now doesn't think twice before he gropes...and those who were adventurous enough to grope have clearly reached a stage where they think any woman they set their eyes on is obligated to satisfy their sexual urges!
If we still ignore such behaviour after everything thats happened we might as well go around asking to be raped...Pardon me if you think i'm being too idealistic...I'm not. If anything i'm being a shrewd opportunist right about now. The country has finally been sensitized to what women have to endure on a daily basis...and the kind of support that women can get to straighten out such people is at its peak...so to unnecessarily quote a cliche, I say strike while the iron is hot and eradicate this culture once and for all!